The Player in all of us
by innocent lil angel
Summary: ‘”You...you don’t want to marry me?” hazel eyes slowly began to fill with glistening tears as the man across her paused. An awkward silence. Slowly, the blonde’s mouth made a distinct, “Eh.” The brunette attempted to smile at the blonde winningly.’
1. Chapter 1

_Summary: '"You...you don't want to marry me?" hazel eyes slowly began to fill with glistening tears as the man across her paused. An awkward silence. Slowly, the blonde's mouth made a distinct, "Eh." The brunette attempted to smile at the blonde winningly.' _

_Genre: Romance/Drama_

_Disclaimer: You see this is a funny story, my great great great great grandmother used to know TP's great great great great grandmother and they used to be great friends…so TP decided to lend them to me…Ok- Two works. I'm broke._

The Player in all of us

Chapter 1- Decisions, decisions and more decisions?

_By Innocent lil angel_

Grabbing her coat, Keladry of Mindelan made her way to the forest. She had been rejected, literally, by all the places which provided the training to become an accepted knight. First, she had applied at the palace in Corus where it had been made that girls could train to become knights 10 years ago. However, they decided to change their mind and give her probation for a year before they would allow for her to become an official _page_.

It sounded and was ridiculous, who had heard of probation for a boy? She just wanted the same chance as the boys had. She didn't want more attention given to her, and most of all she did NOT want the teachers giving her special treatment just because she was of a different gender whom males thought were fragile.

_They **think** that girls are weak. Pssht. I'll show them. Notice the key word, 'think'. They 'think' wrong! _Kel's face was emotionless, the thoughts she was thinking weren't shown on her face as she had learnt from the Yamanis that to show emotions was a sign of weakness.

_They always thought that I was a bit of a drama queen when I first got to the Yamani Islands, _Kel thought wryly, _Maybe I can become one of those people who act, like a Player. After all, no academy in Tortall will take me in as a page and the Maren and Tusaine ones won't take me in either. The convent, _Kel shuddered at the thought of being made into a doll and learning how to walk primly, _Well _that's _out of the question! Maybe I should apply for a Player since I'm still too young to be a member in the Queen's Riders. I'll show the king that I can do something with my life even if he's taken away the dream I've had since I was 4. _

Kel nodded her head slightly as if to affirm herself of her choice. She sat on a broken log in the forest and looked intently at the river before her, the sparkling crystal clear water always managed to take her by surprise and calm her, today was no exception. Her hazel eyes began to water after not blinking for longer than a minute due to the captivation, she wiped the water away from her face and glanced at the rest of her surroundings. Trees of overwhelming height reached her vision and she shook her head, _Too much green can get to you, maybe I'm going colour blind_, Kel tried, to no avail, to see beyond the trees. The most she could manage was a glimpse of dark blue and fluffy whiteness.

Walking on the gravelly ground in the direction towards Mindelan house, some sparrows were twittering around trying to salvage the last crumbs of the day. Keladry stuffed her hands in her pocket to keep out the cold and gain some warmth to find something soft being squashed by her fingers. Gingerly, her fingers pried the thing out of her pocket to find a piece of cake wrapped in tissue.

Puzzled, Kel broke the cake into small bits and tossed them to the sparrows. Thinking back, she remembered the cook giving her a piece of cake before she left for her daily walk yesterday. Shaking her head for the second time in the short period of time, she walked quickly back home.

Later that night, after dinner was done and all her nieces and nephews had been put to sleep, Kel approached her parents. Ilane and Piers of Mindelan looked up to find their youngest daughter taking small steps to the garden bench where they sat.

"What is it dear?" Ilane asked in her distinct melodious tone, her black hair blended in with the night sky only to be illuminated by the lantern near the small creek in the garden.

"Papa, mama," Keladry nodded at each of her parents respectively, "I've decided that I don't want to become a knight." She said firmly, hesitating to give her parents time to react. After all, it had taken her a long time for her mother to agree and her father hadn't been too keen about the whole idea either.

To her surprise, her father asked, "Are you sure you don't want to become a knight Kel? Is this what you want? Do what you want, you don't have to think of what your mother or I think."

Kel stared at her father blankly, "I don't really mind, papa."

"Kel, we're not in the Yamanis anymore. You don't have to shield your emotions." Ilane said, smiling. Kel nodded, returning the smile.

"Papa, mama, I want to become one of those Player people," Keladry stated rather matter-of-factly, "You may think that it's rather hasty and I'm not thinking right but there's no academy who will accept me so I've decided that this isn't a bad idea."

Her parents' mouths were hanging wide open at this suggestion, "Er…Kel, maybe you should rest before you make your final decision." Piers replied, rather shaken.

"Papa, are you alright?" Kel asked, rather alarmed at her father's wide shocked eyes and red lips (as he had been biting them to keep them from hanging open again).

"I'm absolutely fine, what are you talking about?" exclaimed Piers, shaking his head slightly. "Absolutely fine," he repeated, "I'm going to sleep now, and we'll discuss your final decision tomorrow. As it is if you want to become a knight, you shall leave in 3 days. Goodnight Kel." Piers grinned ruefully at Keladry.

Kel kissed his forehead and then her mother's, "Goodnight papa and mama."

Sitting on the bench her parents had vacated, she closed her eyes and wondered whether she was making the right decision. _Papa and mama seemed rather shocked, I guess it's because all they've heard me talking about the last 5 years have been related to my becoming a knight. I'm still going to help those in need and do mostly everything a knight does, I just have to figure out a better way to do it._

Flashback

_A carriage is passing the harbour and a couple of children are helping their parents re-build their home after some bandits raided them._

"_Mama, when I'm old enough to be a knight I'm going to help people like them," Kel said in a determined manner, her eyebrows knit together. Ilane laughed and smoothed Keladry's forehead with the palm of her hand. _

"_You're only 6, Kel! Have you planned out your future already?" Piers asked, half mocking – half serious. _

_The carriage rolled past the children and their parents, giving a view of a great house with servants scurrying here and there._

"_Of course, papa," Kel responded after looking at the house and its inhabitants, "I want to be just like Alanna of Trebond, she's so brave and she became one of the first lady knights in a long long time!" _

"_Keladry! How could you say such a thing? You are a GIRL, you can't be a knight," Conal protested, frowning. "Only boys can become knights, right papa?"_

"_Conal! How could you say such a thing? Apologize to your sister at once!" Piers reprimanded, "King Jonathon made it possible for any maiden to become a knight if they wished, a couple of years ago."_

_Conal stayed silent…very silent after that. _

End of Flashback

Kel sighed, _Maybe I should actually sleep and then decide. By tomorrow, I might actually change my mind. Or will I? _

The next morning dawned bright and clear, Keladry awoke to the sound of chirping outside her window. She slid the glass up and gasped. The sparrows she 'met' yesterday were preparing to build a nest of straws in the single tree outside Kel's window.

Kel grinned and stretched. _I'll need to remember to get some seeds and bread for them. I guess I really am abnormal as Conal calls it, I'm happy that some sparrows have decided to nestle near my window. Oh well. _

Skipping down the last few steps of the staircase, Kel went straight to the kitchen and managed to plea her way into getting hold of some raisin seeds. Stuffing them into her pocket, she had the same noisy breakfast they had every morning. What with the racquet her nieces and nephews caused plus the chattering of gossip between her sister-in-laws and sisters as well as the occasional deep voices between her father and brothers discussing trade, etc.

After washing the plates, (for some reason, she always managed to get the job) Keladry thought about the sparrows and feeling the seeds in her pocket, went upstairs. She frowned, as she noticed the distance between the window and the nest. Putting her hands on hips, she made a few calculations and tried Plan A.

Whistling, she began calling, "Birdie! Little birdie! Come here…- ok, I'm not going to further embarrass myself. It's not working, Plan B shall start!"

The sparrows, had in fact edged away from the nest and had appeared to look rather nervous by Kel's behaviour. "Hmph!" Kel muttered, rather put out, "Ungrateful little animals."

She then threw ¼ of the seeds down near the base of the tree and watched their reaction. They flew down and began squabbling like little kids, she shook her head vigorously. Finally realizing that they weren't paying attention to her, she screamed,

"NO!"

Thus, filling the whole courtyard with noise. Everything seemed to stop. The sparrows looked up at Keladry, she shook her finger at them "Tsk tsk tsk! You shouldn't fight over food! That's not good, there's enough for all of you to stop arguing." With that, Kel threw the rest of the seeds from her pocket down.

"Kel?" Ilane's voice could be heard shouting from downstairs, "Are you alright honey?"

A figure burst into the room and Kel blinked as a group of people appeared. They were all panting and it seemed to Keladry as though they were panting at the same time causing her to laugh uproariously. Her relatives looked at each other in confusion, not having understood what was so funny they tried to ask her.

However, Kel refused to tell them only pointing at them and laughing so hard her shoulders began shaking and droplets of water began to form in her eyes. By then, they had had enough.

"What happened, Kel? Are you ok?" Ilane asked, her eyes full of concern and worry despite what had just taken place.

"I'm…laughter…I'm…more laughter…fine…even more uncontrollable laughter," Kel replied somewhat haltingly.

Slowly, the people hovering around her bedroom door slowly dispersed leaving only her mother. Her mother regarded her blankly, using the same expression as most Yamanis when puzzled, angry, sad or happy. An emotionless mask.

"Kel, are you ok? It's just that this is very unlike you. Firstly, you never screamed at the Yamanis and you never laughed like that, to my memory anyway."

"I'm fine mama," after her laughter had finally died down even though there was the occasional burst. "Remember how I told you I wanted to become one of those acting people? Players? That's why I've decided that I won't keep my mask on every day. Only at the most extreme times, I shall, otherwise I won't be able to be a player either."

"I see, dear. Are you sure you want to keep with this decision though?" Ilane asked again, wanting confirmation.

Kel gave her the confirmation she needed, "Yes mama, I want to be a Player. Now that I'm set on it, I will do it. It may seem like as though I'm giving up training to become a knight but I'll think of another way to help people and learn the fighting techniques."

"The confidence in your voice is enough to show me that you want to be a Player but after such a long time with the Yamanis, keeping your emotions in how can you…?"

Understanding the unspoken question, Kel replied, "I'll get used to it mama, don't worry about me." Kel looked up at Ilane and smiled. The smile was so full of maturity, Ilane couldn't help chuckling.

A/N: What did you guys think? Is the whole idea good enough? Do you guys know anything further on players? Any information which could help. Otherwise, this fic isn't going to go anywhere…b'coz I'll spend most of the time trying to make up stuff…so I'm sorry before hand if the information isn't correct...

_Review? Please? No reviews, no more chappies! (hehe…evil laughter)_

_Luvyas,_

_Innocent lil angel_


	2. Chapter 2 Friend or Foe?

_Thanks to:_

**Baby perfectionist: **Thank you for reviewing, you were my first reviewer sniff sniff nobody likes my story! wails I have updated! You update now! But NO, you _still _haven't updated!

**laloner: **Thanks so much for reviewing! Yeah, I probably sound like I'm obssessed with reviews but that's only because I am. Anyways, thanks for the encouragement

**nativewildmage: **Sorry, I know what you mean. I can't really see Kel as a player either but the rest of the plots seemed slightly similar, anyway sorry if I made you confused and thanks for reviewing...I like reviews hint hint

**Bambolieblue: **Hey! Thank you for reviewing, it means a lot to me. It really does, otherwise I would've stopped with this plot idea altogether.

**Jjinks: **Thank you! I don't understand the player thing either. All I know is they act plays and stuff, which isn't really enough for me to write fanfic with but still. Thanks for reviewing!

_Disclaimer: Don't own nothing except for maybe the plot, I haven't seen this plotso I decided to try it out…the characters as usual belong to TP. And as usual…I'm broke. Seriously._

The Player in all of Us

Chapter 2- Friend or Foe? 

_By Innocent lil angel_

After accepting the training to become a player, Keladry was on her way quick smart to the palace. _Ironic, isn't it? I'm still going to the palace, _Kel thought with a certain smugness. _Even if they don't want me to become a knight, I'll show them what I can do. _Arriving in no time at all, she was sent to a part of the palace where those wanting to become players of her age were situated.

Looking around in awe, even if her papa said that the palace was a miserable rat's nest, Kel sighed in the way that many sigh when overwhelmed. Glancing at the number's on the door, Kel squinted at a door in the corner away from the light. _505. My new 'home'. The door appears rather drab but it'll do for a door. _

Checking to see that she still had her key in her hand, she opened the door and surveyed the scene before her. It wasn't that she minded the structure of the room except there seemed to have been a problem.

"Why is this room so big?" Kel murmured aloud, wondering who in their right mind would give such a big room to a 10 year old girl. Knowing that she wouldn't get an answer, she shrugged slightly, "So much the better I guess, more room for my cats!"

"Sorry to tell you this but no pets are allowed," came a slightly wispy voice near the door. A slender girl's aquamarine gaze followed Kel's troubled hazel ones, the willowy figure stepped into the room uninvited and gradually her lips curved into a smile. Kel's own lips seemed to have moved of its own accord and she was grinning, "We must look rather odd, don't we? Smiling and grinning at each other like we've known each other in years."

Kel nodded, startled whilst observing the young girl before her. Beautiful blue-green orbs gave Kel curious looks, dark black wavy hair swept in an untidy bun gave Kel the impression that this girl was graceful like a dancer. The dark blue material gave off specks of colour as the light shone upon the girl's dress, high neckline, no ruffles or lace and the fact that the dress was rather baggy allowed Kel to conclude that this girl was really modest.

"Sorry, what's your name?" Keladry queried, at the same time gesturing for the girl to sit with Kel on the chairs.

"It's Adeline, Adeline of Trest," was the confident, bubbly reply, "And you're Keladry of Mindelan, correct?"

Keladry was slightly horrified of the idea that after having just arrived at the palace, rumors had already been spread about Kel. She gulped, "What have you heard about me?" Not realizing that she had claimed the mask which concealed all her emotions when she gulped.

"Are you ok? Your face looks all funny and …what's the word? Oh yeah! Blank, why is your face all funny and blank?" Adeline asked, the concern in her tone evident.

"My face?" Kel wondered at what Adeline was trying to say, "Oh…oh..-"

"Oh..what?" Adeline demanded impatiently, her foot tapping against the wood of the table, "Well?" when Kel didn't reply.

Not knowing how to phrase the delicate situation to Adeline, Kel decided to try anyway and stumbled on, "Well, it's just that I've been to the Yamani Islands and they tend to think that to let your emotions out isn't really respectable. Therefore, er, they usually wear a mask whenever they know an emotions is about to come out."

"What?" Adeline's astounded voice, combined with her wide open mouth was comical for Kel. As Kel was about to laugh, her years in the Yamanis kicked in and she bit down the laugh.

"So, you mean to say that if you wanted to laugh- like you just did, you wouldn't be able to in the Yamanis? How stupid is _that_! I mean, what if you were told that your parent's were dead? Would you be allowed to cry?" Adeline began ranting on and on.

"I guess it _is _slightly stupid but I find it useful sometimes," Kel defended, after all she hadn't studied all that for nothing, "I mean, yeah it's stupid when someone's dead and then you're not allowed to cry but it's useful when you're arguing with your parents and then you don't want to show it to make the argument even worse."

Adeline smiled wryly, "You argue even more than my cousin. I realize that the players amongst our year are going to be having a **lot** of competition."

"Why?" Kel asked, puzzled.

"Well, there is this tiny fact that you're a bit of a drama queen and believe me, drama queens' are usually _the _best players ever."

"Really? The people at the Yamani Islands often said that I was a touch dramatic before I learnt the art of concealing emotions," Kel suggested.

"Anyway, as I was saying before…around ½ an hour ago. You're not allowed to have pets in the palace whether or not you have a big room." Adeline said seriously, her brows furrowed tightly together.

"Oh, that! I meant my Yamani lucky cats," Kel said, thinking to grin but not knowing whether or not she should but decided that if she was going to be a player she was going to have to release her emotions so she grinned naturally.

Walking over to her case, lying on her bed she flipped it open and began tossing things here and there. After some very long moments, Kel emerged triumphant with a lucky cat clutched in her hand.

"Thought you could escape me, huh? Well, for your information you canNOT! Haha..ha…ha…-" Kel's laughter trailed off and she tried to explain to Adeline that she didn't often talk to herself or laugh rather manically.

"Er…hi?" Kel's voice was decreased and appeared rather soft.

"Yeah, is that the cats you were talking about?" taking the one Kel had in her hand, Adeline carefully looked at all the minute details on the cat.

"Why does the cat wave at you though?" Adeline's brows furrowed once more, this time out of confusion.

"It's quite a long story, but to cut it short. Actually, wait. You can't really cut it short. If you cut it short then the whole story loses the general point…"

"Kel! Stop being abnormal!" seeing that Kel still wasn't paying attention to her she leaned over the table and screamed in her ear, "THIS IS NOT THE TIME FOR YOU TO BE ARGUING WITH YOURSELF AND LOSING!"

That seemed to work for the next second, "As I was trying to say before –something- interrupted me," Adeline snorted while muttering "Wonder what," "Once upon a time, there was a war in the Yamani Is. and the emperor at the time was about to shoot or was about to be shot (as you can see I've kind of forgotten the details) but seeing a cat waving, the emperor moved out of the way and they won the war. Therefore, it's claimed that these," brandishing the cat in Adeline's hand, "are lucky."

"I see. So, then everyone started the habit of having a lot of these 'lucky' cats and placing them all over the house?" was the incredulous reply.

"I guess, except it's lucky," insisted Kel not at all put off by Adeline's blunt nature, "It really is."

"Of course," Adeline said in a non-committing manner, "How about I give you a tour of the palace? Otherwise you might get lost in no time because, as you can see it's pretty big." She finished with a big flourish of her hands at their surroundings.

"I'll be with you in a while, it's just that I like to get all belongings packed and ready by night time so I won't have to pack then," Kel replied.

"Fussy girl," muttered Adeline, shaking her head.

"What did you say?" Kel asked, her tone accusing.

"Nothing much," Adeline answered, "You know…"

"Adeline, Adeline, Adeline. I find that you really don't know how to change the topic in an embarrassing situation, tsk tsk tsk!" Kel scolded the other obviously taller girl, this time she shook her head with Adeline cowering slightly at Kel's intimidating gesture.

Gleefully, Adeline nodded her head smiling.

"Huh? Aren't you supposed to be horrified? Shocked? Even intimidated? Well anything but there you are **smiling**."

Kel's shock deepened further when Adeline began laughing uncontrollably, "It's..just that..you changed the topic…yourself…hehe..he"

"You are one strange girl, Adeline. How about that tour?" Kel asked, after having stuffed most of her clothing in the drawers and gingerly placed her Yamani lucky cats waving their hands on one shelf of the bookshelf.

"You haven't finished packing though," Adeline pointed out.

"Of course I have, " frowned Keladry.

Gesturing at the books still in Kel's case, "What about your books?"

"I'll pack those later, I mean we're not going to be studying anything right?"

"Of course we are! Even though we're players in training it's like a page, we still learn the theory things like Mathematics and Etiquette or Reading, etc."

"Really? So do we get to do the practical part of the page training?" Kel asked, excited.

"Unfortunately for you, no but fortunately for me. It's just like they don't get to do the stuff you're going to do. You know how you asked me where/what I've heard about you? It's just that you wanted to be knight or lady knight, should I say. It's rare, even after the Lady knight Alanna no girl wanted to go through with the training."

"I know, especially since the king doesn't want any other girl to train. Probation, pssht!" mumbling to herself about the indecency of not being allowed to train as a page to become a knight like every other boy.

Adeline regarded Kel shrewdly, "You really wanted to be a knight didn't you?"

"Of course, how did you know?"

"The most I've actually heard you talking was when you were complaining about not being able to have the same chance as the other boys, apart from that the only time you talked for more than a couple of sentences was when you were telling me the story of the Yamani cats," Adeline said glancing rather doubtingly at the cats themselves, "and I haven't really heard you complain until now. My only conclusion is that you usually don't talk a lot and that you're more of a thinker...-"

"…" Kel interrupted trying to calm Adeline down, "I didn't understandmuch of that sorry. I think you're exaggerating somewhat though. I mean, I've talked for more than a couple of sentences other than the tale of the Yamani cats!"

This time, Adeline interrupted, "How about we go now? The sun's almost set."

"Something logical, let's go." Kel turned around to go when she stopped noticing that Adeline wasn't with her, "Adeline?"

"Yes?" was the small reply.

"What's wrong?" Kel asked. From what she had judged of Adeline's character, she wasn't the kind to worry about nothing and basically over confident in most things.

"It's just that I forgot I was supposed to see my cousin, he's starting his page training tomorrow and if I don't see him today then I won't have too much time because he'll be rather busy. Do you mind if we stop by his place? I promise it wont' be long." Her aquamarine eyes shone pleadingly.

"Of course it doesn't matter Adeline, you strange girl," Kel grinned at said girl's scowl.

As they set outside room 505, Adeline showed Kel her room. "It's odd actually, though you don't know many of the people here a lot of people already know about you. I actually 'knew' you through my cousin. If you think I'm strange, you'd probably call him crazy."

Seeing Kel's disbelieving look, Adeline defended herself, "It's true!"

"Right…" walking quickly they made their way to the page's quarter of the palace.

"It's really confusing getting your way around but you'll get used to it," Adeline said as they passed many staircases, doors and hallways. "Here we are, remember though **he's** the odd one, not me."

"Sure."

"I'm being serious!" Adeline cried, as she knocked on the door.

"When are you _ever_ serious, Addy?" a boy's voice cried out.

Kel turned her attention to the boy standing at the door, emerald green eyes were dancing with messy brown hair flopping onto his forehead, his nose was sharp and Kel thought that there were distinct facial similarities between the boy standing in front of her and Adeline.

"Nealan, " the boy winced, "Adie, you know that I **hate** 'Nealan', only Aunt Morice calls me that and that's only because she hates me though the feeling's mutual..."

Kel stared at the boy in front of her whilst whispering to Adeline, "You were right, Addy, if you don't mind me calling you that, but this cousin of yours **_is_** weird."

"Of course you can call me that, Kel. I told you…" said Adeline shaking her head miserably, "It's an embarrassment whenever I try to introduce friends' to him," whispering again.

"I can see why," Kel whispered back.

It seemed as though the boy, Nealan noticed that nobody was really paying attention to him and realised that the 2 girl's were whispering about something.

"Hey! I am NOT an embarrassment! ADDY! How could you say such a thing!" the outraged cousin yacked on and on about how Addy could say such a thing.

Getting impatient, Adie pushed past Nealan and pulled Kel in with her. "It doesn't matter, " Addy reassured Kel, "he'll notice and then he'll feel guilty that he didn't invite us in earlier."

"Really?" Kel asked doubtfully, "He doesn't look like he can feel guilty, no offense or anything," Kel added as an afterthought.

"I'm not offended, I understand what you feel. I've never been able to understand how Neal can communicate with any of those university people. They're highly intellectual and don't deserve, in my opinion to talk to someone who goes on and on about every little detail."

"What do you mean by that?" Kel asked, rather puzzled.

"You see, if you ask him for a list about Immortals for example, he won't stop with just telling you about the different Immortals but where he got the information from, what he had to do to get the information and **then **he'll give you another list which lists the various sources and etc. it's really hard talking to him sometimes."

As they sat on the chairs, Neal, after having noticed that they had long stopped listening went inside too.

"Hey, you're the Mindelan girl who wanted to become a knight!" Neal exclaimed.

"Let me introduce you, as I was _rudely_ interrupted earlier. Neal, this is Kel. Kel this is Nealan. Or should I say Neal, "Addy added hastily.

The emerald eyes met those of hazel ones for a brief instant then,

"Aren't you too old to be a page?"

_A/N: I am extremely sorry, it's rather sad but I don't think this chapter was really good. I'm sure many of you will agree on that. Sometimes the conversations between Addy and Kel are a bit weird/stilted but yeah me, being the lazy me couldn't be bothered to fix it._

_Anyways, just so you peoples know I have no idea how the training to become a player goes so I made anything up. Sorry, if you think I'm not following the book but I'm not sure if they mentioned anything about it._

_Remember to REVIEW! Otherwise…I'll cry. _

Luv ya lots,

Innocent lil angel


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